Hi! I am here now.
Welcome to Dirty Laundry with Divya by Me, Divya Murthy.
I know the recent tide of writers turning to Substack is usually preceded by some form of disgrace, scandal, and heated discussion among dimwits about #CancelCulture.
I can assure you that I’ve been trying really hard to throw myself into scandal and disgrace but so far I’ve failed. My life remains relentlessly free of crimes and affairs in which I am personally involved and shamed. I am working on changing that, but it’s a long journey— and I need some company with whom I can manage the AUX cord, plot the destination, and talk shit about people and things that don’t affect my life in any way. That’s where you come in.
Dirty Laundry is a space for room-temperature, ambient gossip occasionally interrupted by “trending topics” and sensible subjects. The laundry basket is reflective of my brain’s most useless thoughts — dangerously close to overflowing if someone doesn’t empty it and add bleach. And now you can get a sniff in your inbox.
What you can expect: I will write about getting hot and bothered by things like gyms and sneezes and pimples and you can tell me, “Divya, instead of being hot and bothered, why don’t you try being Hot and Unbothered?” I will write about the stories that get cold-shouldered by editors elsewhere. I will talk to interesting people (you, that’s you!) about fascinating issues (your life, that’s your life!) and paint it all as Gossip Worth Sharing With Your Loved Ones. I will chat, vent, debate, and stun all with the power of my dimwittedness and occasional clarity.
It will all be worth it one day when I get caught up in a high-profile scandal, en route to my cancellation, and you can say, “you know, I once talked to her about the Princess Diaries books. I knew something was off about her.” Invest in me now and cancel me later is my humble request.
Dirty Laundry (noun)
: private matters whose public exposure brings distress and embarrassment
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